Our natural default setting is to always choose love. In practical terms this means having our outsides match what we feel on the inside.
Do you remember as a child feeling your feelings without a second thought? Think about toddlers and their amazing ability to throw temper tantrums with wild abandon.
This is what it means to be fully alive and fully yourself.
I wouldn't recommend going around throwing tantrums, but I would consider honoring whatever bubbles up, even if it is uncomfortable. As a culture, expressing uncomfortable feelings is not the norm. This is why it can feel so counterintuitive.
Honoring our feelings is the most loving choice we could ever make.
The first step is finding moments of pause to notice what is going on inside of us. The next is to give ourselves permission to feel how we actually feel and making choices accordingly.
Our feelings are never wrong, they just are.
If you happen to notice you feel angry, sad, or frustrated, simply acknowledge this and feel it to the extent that you are able. There is no need to pile on judgement or self-recrimination. Admonishing yourself to 'get over it' or 'cheer up' only adds fuel to the discomfort.
Of course, with time and patience, once you've allowed yourself the space to feel, then start to evaluate the next best steps. These steps could lead towards healing change, or it may lead to a simple, quiet acceptance of where you are in this very moment no matter what this looks like.
The truth will always set us free.
Inward & Onward