To better understand where to put your focus and energy when it comes to relationships, it's helpful to define the soul connections in your life. These are the connections that will keep you afloat when the waves of life threaten to overwhelm you.
There's a healthy give and take.
When I was in graduate school, I had an assignment to choose a sport that metaphorically captures the balance of a steady relationship and write an essay about it. The best I came up with at the time was tennis because both sides have to participate equally to make it count. Sometimes one side does more because circumstances shift, but over time, if you look at the whole of the match, both sides contribute. If you are the only one running around and serving the ball up like crazy, it might be time to put your racket down and leave the court for good.
They are your witness. They lift you up when needed, but also cheer you on.
For soul-sustaining connections to endure they become a witness to your life. Your real life, not your social media one. They know when you are hurting but also believe in you so much, they trust you to find your way out of it. They also know when something awesome happens and they are genuinely happy for you. Your happiness is an extension of their happiness.
Bottom line, they are there for you no matter what.
You have imaginary conversations with them to get you through a rough patch.
I cannot tell you how many times I imagine what my friend might say to me when my thoughts are jumbled and I need a perspective shift. One friend and I text each other and then delete it. I know it sounds weird but it helps. We know what the other would say so by the time we get to the end of it, we already have our answer. It works like a charm.
Our time and energy are precious. Be mindful of where you expend these priceless commodities. If you still are struggling to know if a connection is right for you, the struggle is your answer because soul connections flow with ease.
Let your relationships be easy because so much of life isn't.
You deserve to be seen and heard just as you are.
Inward & Onward,
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Great post Diana...and what a though-provoking graduate school assignment. Ironically, as I'm waiting on AJ last week to start his pole vault competition, I watched the girls relay races and thought about what a great metaphor for life. Of course, we all finish "the race" of life - one way or another. However, the journey of how well we pass the baton (love, experiences, mentoring) to one another -- and how received the same -- makes all the difference in our relationships. Wishing all a great week ahead! Scott